Pause: Part Two
Photo by Jornada Produtora on Unsplash
I was listening to a podcast a few weeks ago that was supposed to be helpful, but I started to feel anxious in the middle of it. I wanted to pause the episode, but for some reason I felt like I needed to finish. I didn't want to miss something important. The more I listened to it, the more anxious I felt. Then, I scribbled something in my journal without even thinking, “It’s okay to pause and come back to it." These simple words sounded foreign to me in the moment, but it was the reminder I needed.
I’m the type of person that needs to complete or resolve something right away. I need closure and to round things out well. When I start cleaning the kitchen, I can’t stop until I finish. If I’m facing a conflict with someone, I try my best to resolve it right then and there. I feel more anxious when things are left incomplete. I feel like I can’t rest. This need is helpful when diligence is at work. It’s not as helpful when anxiety is at work. When anxiety is at play, you'd think I'd slow down. Instead, I strap myself in tighter, move faster, and obsess over getting things done. My compulsive behavior takes over when my need to control intensifies. When this happens, I go into hyper drive and it’s almost impossible to stop my body and take a breath. At this point, a pause feels like a waste of time and like a rude interruption.
Pausing doesn’t always feel productive and can drop us off in guilt city fast! I personally feel this when I take a break from writing, but we all know how necessary a break is.
One of my favorite words in the Bible to reflect on is the word selah (סֶֽלָה). This word is found in many of the Psalms, and I love the placement of the word. It often comes after weighty language to give room to the writer and reader to take in all that’s being sung.
“Blessed be the Lord, who daily loadeth us with benefits, even the God of our salvation. Selah.”
Psalm 68:19“What man can live and never see death? Who can deliver his soul from the power of Sheol? Selah.”
Psalm 89:48”Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us. Selah.”
Psalm 62:8
There’s no exact interpretation of the word selah. It’s too beautiful, too distinct, and too meaningful to describe.
According to Easton's Bible dictionary courtesy of Blue Letter Bible the word Selah is:
"A word frequently found in the Book of Psalms, and also in Hab. 3:9, 13, about seventy-four times in all of Scripture. Its meaning is doubtful. Some interpret it as meaning "silence" or 'pause;' others, 'end,’ etc."
What beauty wrapped up in just one word!
We need the selah. We need the pause. We need the break from routine, the silence to take things in, and to let art breathe. We need the word "no" or "stop" to rescue us from our overworked "yes" or "keep trying". We may know all this in our heads, but how often do we celebrate and embrace selah in our bodies or souls?
Rest can be our ally when we let it speak. It has a voice and often times it's telling a bigger story. It's speaking when we feel our heart racing or our jaw clench. It's speaking when we feel a block in our thinking or writing. It's speaking when we're talking in circles or only hearing negative feedback through the voice of true friends.
When we read a finished piece, or a gaze at a finished work of art, we often bypass how many times an artist picked up the work and set it back down. I tried to depict this in my poem titled Pause: Part One. It's a constant challenge of deciding when to stop and when to keep going.
I think that's what makes life what it is. The cautious, yet bold decisions we make to go then stop, stop then go. The pause is not only necessary, it’s heavenly. It’s a depiction of pure praise because humility and dependence are at work. We rely on our senses, our surroundings, and our God to listen, to taste, and to let moments settle in.
This idea of resting is nothing new or even that profound, but that’s my point. It’s almost too simple that we often miss it.
May my simple words serve as a refreshing reminder to your weary or worn out soul.
To the one who feels crazy for putting things on pause. To the one who feels the need to rest, but is struggling — your pause is a gift from God himself. This is the permission, encouragement, and the cheer you need to set the work down. Leave the room, take a drive, and set your overworked burdens at the feet of Jesus. Take the breath he’s given you, and just sit a while.
Journal Prompt
What do you believe about the pause? What feelings or thoughts come to mind about rest?
Write down the word “stillness.” Can you unpack the meaning of that word with a paper and pen?
What work, project, or thoughts do you need to set down right now?